The Mind Stories that Stop Us - Part 2
It's time I told you the rest of the Vancouver story. If you follow me on Instagram, you likely saw the absolute debacle of Westjet chaos that I had to endure **ahem manifested** on my way to and from Vancouver. Well, I figured it was only right that I unpack that with you, too---or at least the next bit of it in this post. Since I unpacked the mind stories that tried to stand in my way from going in the first place, here's what happens when we don't fully unpack our resistance before we head out the door: I'd had an insanely busy week leading up to leaving for Vancouver. The weekend before, we hosted a kids' Halloween party which was what childhood dreams are made of! It was epic and magical, and I stayed cool as a cucumber while we prepped the house and all kinds of Pinterest-worthy Halloween snacks pretty last minute. Another way I've stopped myself from throwing an epic Halloween party for the last few years was the excuse that my husband is always working that weekend and I think I can't manage to throw the party on my own. Well, this year I called bullshit on myself, and am I ever glad I did. It was SO MUCH fun! Anyways, that coupled with Halloween, work, volleyball, kids, and client sessions right up until I had to leave to the airport on Thursday made for a bit of an internal shitstorm of stress before I even left for my trip. Is it any wonder why my flight was delayed before I even left Saskatoon? Nope, it sure isn't. I'd been running for at least a few weeks, and the Universe was giving me space to cool my dang jets. And guess what I did...instead of listening to the sign and taking a hot thirty minutes to sit and cool my jets, I wrote my previous blog post for an hour. So, when I went to send the email out, it wouldn't work. Shock! Horror! No way! LOL! When you don't get the message, or when you refuse to pause, receive, or open your eyes to the message, it's going to keep showing up. My flight was delayed two hours before I even left Saskatoon... and it all was fine. My connection was rescheduled by the time I arrived in Calgary, so I had extra space to relaxxx. But, I still didn't. Clearly, my nervous system had been firing at full steam for a little too long. Wanna guess what happened next? My flight boarded on time, but then we sat on the plane waiting for over an hour for ground crew to load our baggage. Oh boy. Maybe that was so I could make space to unpack some of my internal baggage... So that's what I did. I finally paused to look at who was delaying... SURPRISE! It was me! I got my notebook out and MindScaped about my fears and resistance for the weekend ahead. There was a lot to unpack. Going to an event solo in a ginormous city I've only been to a couple of times was a big comfort zone stretch. Sure, I had met some of these women online, but I hadn't met them in person yet, none were staying at my hotel, and I didn't even have any of their phone numbers. My ego was scared and I needed to unwind the uptight stories that had been spun in my mind.
This is what happens when we don't lean into our resistance, when we reject our fear, and when we won't make space to dig in to see what is underneath it all. I dug up all kinds of insights in MindScape and I had to use an extreme point of view technique to soothe my scared ego.
Sometimes it can be helpful for our minds to look at the worst that could happen, and ask ourselves, "But, would I die?" When we take our fears to the worst extremes, it can help us gain perspective to poke some holes in those intricately-woven webs of fear. Here was the worst that could happen: - No one replies to my messages and I spend the weekend alone. But, would I die? NO. That would also be pretty great. - No one replies to my messages and I have to go into the event solo. But, would I die? Nope. I could survive that for 4 minutes, then I could say hi to a stranger. I'm probably not the only person showing up solo. - I don't align with the event or the speakers. But, would I die? No. I'm likely not going to agree with every presenter unless my brain is turned off and in zombie mode. - I have to go eat in a restaurant alone. But, would I die? No, I've done that before and I'll do it again--even if it's uncomfortable at the start. Like I said in my last email: Our mind makes up all kinds of very convincing stories to tell us what we cannot do—whether that’s because we think it’s impossible or illogical, or that we aren’t capable. When we boil it all down, these stories are excuses to keep us safe, warm, and cozy in our comfort zones. And even when we do push past those stories to create a different experience of reality, if we don't unpack our belief system baggage along the way, we will without a doubt find ourselves on a turbulent ride. Even when it's the ride we say we want to be on... Even when it's the dream we've been dreaming about... Even when we had to practically move a mountain to make it happen... Even when it manifested with so much ease that we can't believe our eyes... but on the inside we are screaming in full rollercoaster fear mode with white knuckles clenched on the "safety bar"... If we want to change our experience, we have to lean into our fears, unpack our mind stories. I needed to ask myself, what if this experience could be flippin' magical?!
But, I wasn't ready for that quite yet.
So, needless to say, I got to Vancouver much later than anticipated, and after waiting for this and that and bags and ground crew and whatever else, I got to my hotel at 1AM without my checked baggage. The next day, I slept in, then explored downtown Vancouver on my own. It was lovely to have no schedule, and even when my brain was reminding me about the work I "should be doing" because I didn't have the interruption of kids, I *knew* in my heart that I needed some space to wander wherever my heart desired to go. My brain was mush, so work wouldn't have been productive anyways, and apparently, THIS is how I had to get the message through my thick skull to chill the eff out, relax, unwind, and reconnect to myself. For supper, I decided to find my courage and walk to Corduroy Restaurant---a restaurant I'd heard a lot about. If I was going to eat on my own, I might as well choose somewhere I wanted to go to instead of settling for a random location. While en route, I got replies that the others were going to go there, too... and it ended up being our first in-person reunion full of real-life hugs, happy tears, and the best connection. The next morning, my new friends picked me up in the lobby of my hotel to head to the event, and the most incredible magic happened that day. The first woman I got chatting with before we even went into the event room asked where I was from. When I said, "Warman, SK, just north of Saskatoon." She replied, " Are you the author from Warman?"
What?! There's no way she actually knows my books, I thought. "Ummm, children's books?" I replied, flabbergasted! Seriously, what are the chances? She's like, "Ya! I bought one for my niece... the Sweet Dreams one." Just wow. That is my book. How in the world could that be my first interaction when I'm two provinces from home?! When the doors opened to the venue, I found a seat at a table with a couple of people I had met, but didn't really know, and about 10 other complete strangers. When the keynote speakers got started, my business mentor, Sarah Swain, lit a fire in me to take my businesses to the next level. She is such a well-spoken, big-thinking entrepreneur with the rock-solid foundational knowledge to back it up. The speakers that followed were great, and I came away with nuggets of awareness from each presentation. While chatting at our table on a break, I sat beside the woman I had spoken to in the morning and she shared with the lady beside her that I was a children's author, and they asked about my books. I had some books with me, so I brought them out, and this lady was blown away when she saw Hazel Mist, Hypnotist--about the psychology of the mind--because she was an actual hypnotist! "Can I buy this from you? I have to have this!" she said. Whoa. The last speaker of the day got up on stage and he completely knocked the socks off of everyone in the room. His name was Corrie George and was wearing a fancy suit complete with pocket scarf on a Saturday. He carried himself with such poise and emanated deep confidence and empowerment. There was just something about him that I knew he was going to deliver something very important. I was absolutely floored by his presentation--in the best possible way. Some of his truth bombs were:
Who are you listening to? Seriously consider how you're spending your time and what information you're consuming.
"Only seek advice from people who have what you want and have been where you are."
"Be skeptical of what's widely accepted in practice."
"Don't take advice from anyone you wouldn't want to trade places with. ON ANYTHING." (OOOF + BOOM all at once---am I right?!)
"Don't take criticism from people you wouldn't take advice from." Bazinga!
"Focus on building your skills. That's how you win."
My mind was so blown open after listening to Corrie George that I actually felt limitless. I felt like I could lasso rainbows with my ponytail! WOW. This is how I want to leave people feeling after my classes, I thought. Like any.freaking.thing is actually, truly possible. My brain was tingling, my eyes were sparkling, and my face was lit up. My energy was charged and I felt unstoppable. I made a mental note of this feeling because why couldn't this be my actual state of being every day, right? It absolutely could be. The event finished with a speaker round table Q&A, and it was a great way to wrap up the day. Then as I was packing up to head out, another neighbour at my table asked if she could buy The Sweet Dreams Expressfor her daughter who has a hard time sleeping. As I was signing the book for her, she said, "You look really familiar." I was surprised. "Oh really? I'm not from here, so we probably haven't met. I'm from Saskatchewan." "Hmm..." she said. "Well, my best friend is from Saskatchewan." "Oh ya?" I replied, thinking I don't know if that'll help. "Whereabouts?" "She's from Rosetown." Shut the front door. "No way! I'm from Rosetown! Who's your best friend?" "Brittany..." *For privacy concerns, I'll keep it to a first name basis.* My jaw hit the floor. "Shut up!" I burst out laughing. She goes, "Wait, are you Brittany's Kristin?!" My eyes got so wide and I started laughing in disbelief. I nodded my head. "WOW!" I couldn't believe it. "Oh my god, you are! That's why I recognized you!" she said. I met my high school best friend's current best friend. Two provinces over. At an event with 110 people at it. Like what are the actual chances?! Less than one in a million?! We talked for a good thirty minutes after the event was over and took a picture together to send to our mutual bestie, both of us smiling and shaking our heads in disbelief. She had lived with my high school best friend right out of high school--but I had also moved away to the States for University the next year--so hadn't gone to visit my bestie at all. She recognized me from seeing photos in our mutual best friend's picture frames. And then, when I shared that I was a BodyTalk Practitioner, she said "No way! My mom does BodyTalk, too!" My face hurt from smiling so much! How in the world could this day have been so flipping amazing?! I felt like my brain was saying so often, "What are the chances?!" as if it was doubting the magic that was unfolding all around me. I could hear my husband reply in my mind, "How are you still surprised by these kinds of things?" Right. Trust the magic. It's always happening.
I walked back to my hotel with a solid, rooted, empowered pep in my step and I felt about 8 feet tall, like nothing was out of reach. This trip and this event was exactly what I needed. I was changed. I had been alchemized. Fear melted, empowerment surged. I
was ready to lasso rainbows with my ponytail like Poppy from the Trolls movie. I was ready to up level my businesses, my life. Everything. But, none of this would have started if I didn't follow that intuitive inkling that I needed to go to this "impossible" event. Question your BS. It will change you, which will change everything.
I'll be back with part 3 soon as I dig into my return flight cancellation, airport delays, and a fancy (and free) hotel room.